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August 03, 2006

Am I The Most Oppressed Person On Earth, Or Merely #2?

I'm once again being unjustly forced to do actual work. I hope someone will notify Amnesty International of this grave human rights violation.

In any case, my appearances here will be rare for a while longer. In the meantime, don't miss this resignation letter from two Jordanian women to their employer, Fox News.

Posted at August 3, 2006 06:16 AM | TrackBack

Here a transcript of the official Fox version to be shown later today:

"High everybody! This is Sheepfucker Jones along with my hot lookin' anchor, Quivering Quim. We got some sad news today right here within our own little community. We had to fire 2 Ay-rab wimmin who were filing false news reports from the Middle East and it turns out that these 2 wimmin, Sah-reena Sowbag and Joh-manna Cardshark, are terrorists right here in our midst! What up with that, huh? Well, these 2 terrorists are out the door and don't you be believin' any of those conspiracy news reports saying otherwise. I know I was totally avoiding Mel Gibson yesterday, but right now I'd give my eye teeth for some news from Hollywood. What's say we talk to Quivering Quim for an update? Take it away, Quiv!"

Posted by: americanintifada at August 3, 2006 07:43 AM

I know the feeling. I feel the same way every time I have to do actual work. It's unfair. There's been no work for months and then suddenly - here it is and it has to be done. By me. Wtf?

Posted by: abb1 at August 3, 2006 12:02 PM

I wrote a petition and had all my friends and relatives sign it and I sent it to Amnesty International. I did what I could Jonathan but will it be enough? Only time will tell, in the mean time our prayers and thoughts will be with you in your hour of distress.

I have given much thought to the Fox News issue but decided since I have never watched Fox News I really had nothing to say about it. However I will say this...about that and that about this.
I hope I have made my postion clear.

Posted by: rob payne at August 4, 2006 12:03 AM

How does that tune go? When your smiling the whole world smiles with you.

Yeah that is how it goes alright.

"Four U.S. paratroopers charged with murdering three detainees in Iraq smiled before shooting them."

Say cheese. Also see this about Haditha.

"WASHINGTON - Evidence collected on the deaths of 24 Iraqis in Haditha supports accusations that U.S. Marines deliberately shot the civilians, including unarmed women and children, a
Pentagon official said Wednesday."

Well Zaid said... Murtha has created an environment that really smells. Oh really? Is that what is going on here? I would say Bush, Cheney, Rice, Wolfowitz, Pearl, Krauthammer and all the rest of the whackos are the ones who have created yon smelly environment. But none of them will stand trial now or ever. I think that stinks.

One thing is for sure when these political clowns and Mid East experts head off into the sunset with their golden parachutes and other ill-gotten gains no one will be singing "Oh when the Saints come marching in."

Posted by: rob payne at August 4, 2006 12:38 AM

Whoops, forgot the original link via bopnews.

Posted by: rob payne at August 4, 2006 12:42 AM

Fox version of oppressed journalist Jon Schwarz:

"High everybody? We sure hope so because it's going to take plenty of Prozac to prepare yourself for this next report! Terrorist blogger Jonathan Schwarz is claiming to be so fatigued by his attacks on our broadcast methods that he and his minnions of Islamofascist freaks are applying to Amnesty International for an investigation of massive Human Rights violations. This comes from an 'alleged journalist' who yesterday put out a story that the two Ay-rab wimmin terrorists that we fired actually quit of their own accord. Can you believe anybody would actually quit and leave our family? Amazing,isn't it? Imagine the audicity of this bozo! It's purty much what you'd expect from somebody who graduated from Stutts anyway, huh? Well, this is Sheepfucker Jones saying 'bye for now' and stay tuned for our newest addition to the Fox family and expert at the Latin American affairs desk, Mr. Fidel Castro! This guy's gonna be good folks! If you like Ollie North, old Fidel will KILL you!!!"

Posted by: americanintifada at August 4, 2006 01:50 AM

While Israel pursues the path of violence Iraq is dissolving as a country before our eyes. This is the legacy of Bush and his poorly advised advisors. The San Francisco Chronicle says civil war is possible which is rather odd because civil war has been taking place for some time now. I guess it depends on how you define things which is what the news and the government excels at.

I think we all might pause for a moment of silence at the passing of a nation which after all did not take much. Mostly ignorance combined with astonishing bad judgment or to put it more simply the work of a bunch of moronic idiots who now reside in the Whitehouse.

I doubt the passing of Iraq as a nation is taking anyone but Americans by surprise but then Americans tend to see things through their own special lens that divides reality into your side and my side which after all is not a terribly realistic outlook but there you have it. We all seem to think that somehow everything will come out in the wash, everything will be okay as if we have some kind of gene that generates an idiotic sense of optimism often spoken of as American know how or can do.

Looking at the article in the Chronicle we can see how this optimism has led us down the path of wholesale destruction and just how surprised certain folk seem to be.

First let us hear from the good Generals.

General Peter Pace says we do have the possibility of devolving into civil war. General John Abizaid says ditto and the good Peter Pace is SURPRISED at the situation. The good General Pace goes on to say that the issue of civil war is up to the Iraqi to resolve. Yet there would have been no civil wars without the help of geniuses like Pace and his boss the commander in chief. However that is often how things happen, a few good idiots screw everything up for everyone else and then those self same idiots just trot along on their merry way rarely looking back or at themselves to closely.

The sheer stupidity of this whole venture is nothing less than monumental.

And what do two of the most well known politicos who have supported the war in Iraq namely Hillary Rodham Clinton and John McCain have to say on the matter?

McCain blames the military and says this is all very disturbing. Hillary tells Rumsfeld he is presiding over a failed policy. So even at this late date the problem according to these two intellectual giants is that it is the method and not the madness. Astonishing isn’t it. But don't feel bad Hillary may be our next president.

And what does Rumsfeld say? He says my goodness.

If you read the article as you scroll down you will read what the experts are saying. Things like civil war is a tactic to drive the Americans out, security must be strengthened, The Iraqi government needs to develop jobs. Oh boy that is rich the government should develop jobs.
Obviously what Iraq needs is more tennis courts, traffic lights and a state run lottery to take their minds off of the negative things in life.

Rumsfeld also says it is not a classic civil war at this stage. Those darned definitions again but I have to admit that is classic Rumsfeld.

Posted by: rob payne at August 4, 2006 07:44 AM

What's great...WHAT'S GREAT about AMERICA is our complete inability to accept responsibility for the actions of those we hire, those we elect. They don't elect themselves, we put them in office. They don't have the power, we do. They don't build the bombs or weapons, we do. They don't ever go out and fight, we do. They don't get their hands dirty, we do. And most assuredly don't pay for it all, we do

Posted by: Mike Meyer at August 4, 2006 11:13 AM