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September 23, 2008

Paulson's Plan Explained

By: Bernard Chazelle

Me, big banker going bankrupt! Hey, taxpayer, wanna buy my shitpile? Sure, how much is it worth? 80 cents to the dollar! Yeah, right, that crap is worth 10 cents to the dollar. I say 80! I say 10! I say 80! I say 10!

Paulson: Quiet children. I say we determine the price by asking a neutral, objective, trustworthy expert, like, say, another big banker going bankrupt! So what do you say, other big banker going bankrupt? How much is it worth? I say 90 cents to the dollar!

Congressional Chorus: That's a deal!

Pelosi, Frank, and the rest busy writing 700 billion checks: "How do you spell 90?"

Paulson: "N.I.N.E.T.Y.N.I.N.E."

— Bernard Chazelle

Posted at September 23, 2008 03:55 PM

Our elected leaders hardly know Geography, never remember History so why do we expect them to have ANY KNOWLEDGE of MATHS? And as far as I know, they are always generous with someone else's money. It would be VERY INTERESTING to know, how much they are making out of this trillion dollar plan.

Posted by: Rupa Shah at September 23, 2008 04:18 PM

After the people of America spoke in 1980, the brighest and best took their cue and ran to Harvard Business School and Goldman Sachs and, for the most part, jumped happily into the Greed of the Gilded Age, Part II. The peoples' reps in DC were rewarded plenty to work together and craft the legislation that pleased the self-proclaimed "masters of the universe." Wealth management trumped a social contract anytime.
And now, that the most heavily rewarded brains in America--from HBS to Wall Street to the Capitol--have fucked up royally, progressives want to email, call or fax their reps, who pretend to be angry, yes angry, that such a thing could have happened here. Ohy my. Where's Rick's sly smile of "Casablanca?"
Better than faxing or emailing, get your ass over to the Cafe Milano in Georgetown, where the reps and their Ivy buddies sit over $ 35 pastas and very nice Chianti. And instead of a fax, do bring an envelope with a substantial (think at least six figures) contribution.
You want them to hear you? Try that. Everything else is white noise.

Posted by: donescobar at September 23, 2008 05:53 PM

That's a nice economy you got there; be a shame if something was to happen to it . . .

Posted by: Monkay at September 23, 2008 09:53 PM

Here's the problem. MLK was necessary, but not sufficient, and ultimately, Malcolm X was right.

What do I mean?

Well, our country got the civil rights legislation passed not because the Democrats had a severe attack of conscience, but because they did the math and decided that mass riots created by 10% of the population locked permanently into underclass status was bad. 10% of the population can bring the whole thing down.

The American Revolution was waged by 33% of the population. (33% patirots, 33% neutral, 33% tories)


get your ass over to the Cafe Milano. . . do bring . . . a substantial (think at least six figures) contribution.
You want them to hear you? . . .Everything else is white noise.

Instead of six figures, I submit we need 25%.

Patriots or progressives or whatever don't even make up 25% of the Democrats, I'd wager. So down we go. . .

Posted by: No One of Consequence at September 24, 2008 12:18 AM

Sen. Bernie Sanders has a petition to make sure you don’t get totally screwed by this mess.
Please sign and post as many places as you can. We will not be left holding the bag (of shit)!

Posted by: john in california at September 24, 2008 12:40 AM

Here's the place to go if you want some help finding someone to buy your shit pile;

Posted by: cemmcs at September 24, 2008 09:37 PM