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February 14, 2007

Blame Canada Dennis!

In the wake of the John Edwards blogger "scandal," many have wondered whether regular bloggers will ever be able to work for political campaigns. (Well, Democratic political campaigns. Anything whatsoever remains OKIYAR.)

Fortunately, Dennis is riding to the rescue with an easy solution—blame him:

Look -- there's no way in hell that a serious Democratic campaign is going to hire the likes of me. Not only is my contempt for this corrupt, archaic political system open for all to see, my public opinions have bordered on slander and oftentimes read like a lunatic's screams. When it comes to mainstream political discussion, I'm toxic, damaged goods. But that doesn't mean you have to suffer the same marginalization. So instead of quitting a campaign under pressure, why not Blame Me! for your previous outbursts!

For an affordable, privately-negotiated fee, I'll allow you to insert my name in your blog archives, making me the source of any or all hostile opinions you may have typed in the heat of the moment. When your political enemies are searching for something that can embarrass your candidate, instead of finding this:

The crypto-fascist Christers are trying to shove their blood-stained crucifix up our collective ass.

They'll see this:

'The crypto-fascist Christers are trying to shove their blood-stained crucifix up our collective ass,' said Dennis Perrin, discussing the GOP's 2008 campaign strategy.

The rest.

Posted at February 14, 2007 02:21 PM | TrackBack

Everyone gets the really good ideas before I do. Does that seem fair to you?

Posted by: Mike Meyer at February 14, 2007 03:23 PM

Dennis is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy. I wish I'd heard of this service he's offering before, even if I'm not a blogger. Oh well . . . but I guess there's always 2012!

Posted by: Joe Biden at February 14, 2007 05:01 PM

I'm no expert when it comes to words and their precise meanings, but I think I'm on safe ground here.

When Dennis says his words have been borderline slander, that may well be true, but his written words would be borderline libel.

Hey, don't get me wrong here. I love all Dennis' words except he does tend to use too fucking much goddamn profanity for my taste.

Posted by: SPIIDERWEB™ at February 14, 2007 07:46 PM

Dennis man you rock!


Posted by: patience at February 14, 2007 09:48 PM