or Powell's or me• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show
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"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket
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"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming
February 08, 2007
I Wish Elliot Abrams Would Come Up With New Ways To Lie To Us
Here's Elliot Abrams today, lying about never having seen Iran's 2003 peace offer:
Leverett said yesterday that he became aware of the two-page offer, which came over a fax machine at the State Department, in his waning days in the U.S. government as a senior director at the National Security Council, but that it was not his responsibility to put it on Rice's desk because Rice had placed Elliott Abrams in charge of Middle East policy. "If he did not put it on her desk, that says volumes about how she handled the issue," he said yesterday.Abrams is currently the deputy national security adviser in charge of the Middle East and democracy promotion. An NSC spokeswoman, speaking on behalf of Abrams, said yesterday that Abrams "has no memory of any such fax and never saw or heard of any such thing."
Here's Elliot Abrams in 1984, lying about massacres by the Salvadoran military:
Appearing with Aryeh Neier on "Nightline' in February, Abrams insisted to Ted Koppel, "I'm telling you there were no massacres in El Salvador in 1984.' When Neier asked about reported massacres in Los Llanitos in July and near the Gualsinga River in August, Abrams countered, "They never happened"...When asked by Koppel if the embassy had investigated reports, Abrams's confidence seemed to drop: "My memory is that we did, but I don't want to swear to it because I'd have to go back and look at the cables." Neier says embassy officials have told him the investigations never took place; the State Department has never offered proof to the contrary.
Here's Elliot Abrams in November, 1986, lying to the Senate Intelligence Committee about the contras:
SENATOR BRADLEY: So let me ask it again. Did either one of you ever discuss the problems of fundraising by the contras with members of the NSC staff?MR. ABRAMS: No, I can't remember.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: the only way to get appointed to a high political position in America is to have a terrible memory for politics.
(Post story via Zembla)
Posted at February 8, 2007 08:40 PM | TrackBackChief Sitting Bull said, "All men from Washington are liars".
Posted by: Mike Meyer at February 8, 2007 09:47 PMArgh, what the fuck. *I* remember that stupid peace overture. And IT'S NOT EVEN MY FUCKING JOB. I AM NOT THE SECRETARY OF STATE> FUCKING CHRIST!!!! ARGH AND OTHER WORDS OF EXTREME ANNOYANCE/ANGER!
Posted by: saurabh at February 9, 2007 01:18 AMThere is a special place in hell for those who can, but don't, try to stop wars.
I have burned in my memory the picture of the blood stained child whose parents were killed by American soldiers at a roadside checkpoint - simply because the parents paniced and tried to drive through.
Fuck Abrahms. Seriously. Fuck him.
Posted by: jimbo at February 9, 2007 01:54 AMif that were any ordinary person, abrams would have been fired. out of a cannon. into the sun.
Posted by: almostinfamous at February 9, 2007 03:26 AMThe Bushanistas seem to be so heavily influenced by their own propaganda network that they are now using their own bastardized version of Bart Simpson's lame excuse "I didn't do it! It was like that when I got here!"
Posted by: JLaR at February 9, 2007 05:51 AMjimbo:
Hell is (probably) lousy with people who could, but didn't, (and/or don't) try to stop wars--since that class of sinners (potentially) includes (almost) everybody who ever did, does and/or will draw a breath. I'd like to think though, that the really special places are reserved for the people who go out of their way to stir wars up...
I am a former member of the Unitarian Universalist Association, a 20th-century merger of two liberal Protestant or Post-Protestant denominations. The Universalists got their name from their most salient theological feature, their contention that God was too nice a Person to condemn ANY soul to Hell forever - in other words, they believed in Universal Salvation.
The Unitarians, of course, got their name because they thought that God was One, not Three - a position found in some earlier religions as well.
As for me, I have gone well beyond the UUA - I am now so theologically liberal that I regularly attend pre-Protestant religious services (i.e. go to Catholic mass with my wife), even while expressing my trademark undogmatic wish:
May the Creative Forces of the Universe, if any, have mercy on our souls, if any.
I'm not really joking.
Posted by: mistah charley, ph.d. at February 9, 2007 09:29 AMOur TAXDOLLARS have bought us a ticket to Hell. The good news is we'll have PLENTY of company and conversation with like minded folks.
Posted by: Mike Meyer at February 9, 2007 12:26 PMAbrams is one key to my theory that the morons who planned the invasion of Iraq figured that it would be a Middle Eastern version of Bush I's invasion of Panama -- go in, topple the formerly friendly dictator, leave the country to someone else.
But after the mess they've made in Iraq, can even Abrams, Cheney, etc be stupid enough to think that Iran is East Nicaragua, and if you put a little death-dealing pressure on an unfriendly regime, it'll fold?
Surely they are capable of some learning, sometimes? I assume, for example, that Dick Cheney is now a bit more careful about seeing where his hunting partners are before he pulls the trigger.
Posted by: Whistler Blue at February 9, 2007 01:19 PMYeah, maybe he's quit drinking after his THIRD heart attack too.
Posted by: Mike Meyer at February 9, 2007 06:19 PMThe only thing you need to know, the ONE thing you need to contantly remind yourself: at $2,900 BILLION a year, the Bushistanis are firmly in command of the largest shakedown con operation on Earth ... ever.
Anything else is lip-smacking and knob-gobbling on their part ... and on ours, as riders on the storm.
Red Army ... Blue Army, alla time same-same, li da.
