You may only read this site if you've purchased Our Kampf from Amazon or Powell's or me
• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show

"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket

"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming

October 21, 2006

But Missions And Goals Are Of Course Completely Different Things

March 6, 2003:

Q What can you say tonight, sir, to the sons and the daughters of the Americans who served in Vietnam to assure them that you will not lead this country down a similar path in Iraq?

THE PRESIDENT: That's a great question. Our mission is clear in Iraq. Should we have to go in, our mission is very clear: disarmament... it's very clear what we intend to do. And our mission won't change. Our mission is precisely what I just stated.

October 20, 2006:

Bush said in an Associated Press interview..."Our goal has not changed. Our goal is a country that can defend, sustain and govern itself, a country that which will serve as an ally in this war. Our tactics are adjusting."

Posted at October 21, 2006 03:45 PM | TrackBack

Damn I wish someone would teach this idiot English.

Posted by: SPIIDERWEB™ at October 21, 2006 04:57 PM

"Our goal is ... a country that which will serve as an ally in this war."

Bush has his work cut out for him -- considering the fact that two-thirds of Iraqis support attacks on American troops.

Posted by: Lloyd at October 21, 2006 05:05 PM

Ever been on a snipe hunt, Jon? You'd remember if you had...

Ever organized one?


Published on Friday, February 14, 2003 by the Daily Mirror/UK

Why We Should March Tomorrow

by John Pilger


Published on Friday, March 14, 2003 by the Los Angeles Times

Democracy Domino Theory 'Not Credible'

A State Department report disputes Bush's claim that ousting Hussein will spur reforms in the Mideast, intelligence officials say

by Greg Miller


Published on Sunday, May 11, 2003 by the Washington Post

Frustrated, U.S. Arms Team to Leave Iraq

Task Force Unable To Find Any Weapons

by Barton Gellman


Published on Thursday, September 11, 2003 by the Financial Times/UK

Iraqis Do Not Trust Americans, Says Poll

by Guy Dinmore in Washington

Posted by: Mike at October 21, 2006 05:07 PM

Left one significant 'development' out of my "snipe hunt" message above:


Published on Thursday, August 14, 2003 by the New York Times

US Abandons Idea of Bigger UN Role in Iraq Occupation

by Steven R. Weisman with Felicity Barringer


Posted by: Mike at October 21, 2006 06:23 PM

There was really only one goal, the one Bush never told us about, the goal of creating as much fear as possible. You have to really admire the 37 percent who still support Bush for they have weathered more goals than one could imagine as being humanly possible and I take my hat off to them if I ever decide to wear a hat. They have spent so many years unaware of the ephemeral and shifting shoals of goals provided by Bush that it makes you wonder something, I am not sure what, but definitely something.

As Molly Ivins said recently most of America is so far ahead of Bush that these statements of staying the course have become pathetic if pathetic is a strong enough term to describe it. I picture Bush standing in front of a mirror repeating lines from Tony Snow, "I do not get jumpy over polls, I know it is tough but I am a strong leader, I will stay the course as long as it someone else who has to do the dying."

Remember we have nothing to fear but the fear of not fearing enough.

Posted by: rob payne at October 21, 2006 08:22 PM

Jonathan, why are you making things so complicated. Our goal in Iraq is simple and clear: it is to give our commander in chief the opportunity to say mission as often as he can.

He has loved missions ever since, as a boy, he dreamed about being on Mission Impossible. Wouldn't that be cool? And those missions would be so much cooler than his Dad's missions! Because whenever his Dad came home from those missions, it was always the ritual of going over the list of funny things he'd done and his Dad's wicked bility to use the Deke paddle, handcrafted by a paddlesmith from Texas A and M. Boy that smarted!

Someday, though, he'd grow up and get to dress in an air pilot's suit and say, Mission Accomplished! And everyone would cheer! And his Dad would feel so bummed! And his Mommie would be proud.

So don't play around with words, buster. The mission was accomplished, since the accomplishment of the mission was to get to say mission. Someday he is going to go for broke and call it Mission Impossible. Probably at one of those Press club wingdings, where he is so totally funny. Everybody will love it, too. Da Man, they'll call him. The mission man.

Posted by: roger at October 23, 2006 12:20 PM