You may only read this site if you've purchased Our Kampf from Amazon or Powell's or me
• • •
"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show

"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket

"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming

May 29, 2004

Judith Miller is Fucking Right

From Salon, here's an excellent quote from Judith Miller about one of her stories about purported banned weapons in Iraq:

"You know what," she offered angrily. "I was proved fucking right. That's what happened. People who disagreed with me were saying, 'There she goes again.' But I was proved fucking right."

Now, at first glance this makes no sense whatsoever, since nothing in her article has been proven right. In fact, very little in any of her reporting on this subject was accurate. But -- what if we are all misunderstanding Miller? What if by "fucking right" she meant "having sex correctly"?

With that in mind, let's look at the quote again, with minor changes:

"You know what," she offered angrily. "I was proved to be having sex correctly. That's what happened. People who disagreed with me were saying, 'There she goes again.' But I was proved to be having sex correctly."

You see? Now it makes perfect sense. Remember that Miller has come under intense criticism not just for her atrocious reporting; many people also claimed she was still, as of 2003, having sex incorrectly.

Of course, the whole world knows Miller had sex incorrectly during the eighties. That's never been in dispute. Indeed, thousands of people (mostly Iranian) were killed.

The question was whether she was still having sex incorrectly as of 2003. The US and UK intelligence agencies were certain she was, and claimed Miller was a threat not just to her neighbors but the entire world. However, their certainty now appears to have been based on "evidence" manufactured by Ahmad Chalabi.

Does this mean those of us who attacked Judith Miller were wrong to do so? No. There is still the issue of her horrendous reporting, condemned in numerous UN resolutions. Even those who opposed attacking Miller must admit she's one of worst reporters since World War II, comparable to such monsters as Charles Krauthammer and Bob Woodward. It was critical that the world come together to oppose her evil actions, particularly in such a strategically important area as the New York Times.

Posted at May 29, 2004 05:03 PM | TrackBack
Comments

The most important question is: Was she having sex correctly with Chalabi?
No, sorry, that's just pointless gossip-mongering but then again even as a metaphor for the whole elite press-ruling class relatioship, it seems quite fitting.

Posted by: Sonicg at May 30, 2004 09:12 PM

Sonicg,

No no no. The most important question is: was Judith Miller having sex incorrectly with Al-Qaeda?

And here the extended humor metaphor finally breaks down.

Posted by: Jonathan Schwarz at May 30, 2004 09:32 PM

Ron Brynaert,

I hope The Rules of Embedment went well at the Cherry Lane Theater. As it happens, I used to live right around the corner.

I also found the information about THAW interesting and encouraging.

Posted by: Jonathan Schwarz at May 30, 2004 09:47 PM

Thanks,

It went okay. We're going to be doing guerrilla street performances during the RNC in August.
The people at THAW are great.

Posted by: Ron Brynaert at May 30, 2004 10:46 PM