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"Mike and Jon, Jon and Mike—I've known them both for years, and, clearly, one of them is very funny. As for the other: truly one of the great hangers-on of our time."—Steve Bodow, head writer, The Daily Show
"Who can really judge what's funny? If humor is a subjective medium, then can there be something that is really and truly hilarious? Me. This book."—Daniel Handler, author, Adverbs, and personal representative of Lemony Snicket
"The good news: I thought Our Kampf was consistently hilarious. The bad news: I’m the guy who wrote Monkeybone."—Sam Hamm, screenwriter, Batman, Batman Returns, and Homecoming
January 10, 2005
Why Does The Official U.S. Legal Code Hate America?
Here's something else interesting about the Newsweek story about the "Salvador option" being considered for Iraq: according to the U.S. Code, this is a textbook example of "international terrorism." And this means the Bush administration is a "terrorist group."
22 U.S.C. 2656f
As used in this section--
(1) the term ``international terrorism'' means terrorism involving citizens or the territory of more than 1 country;
(2) the term ``terrorism'' means premeditated, politically motivated violence perpetrated against noncombatant targets by subnational groups or clandestine agents; and
(3) the term ``terrorist group'' means any group practicing, or which has significant subgroups which practice, international terrorism.
Now, let's look at the "Salvador option" again:
...one Pentagon proposal would send Special Forces teams to advise, support and possibly train Iraqi squads, most likely hand-picked Kurdish Peshmerga fighters and Shiite militiamen, to target Sunni insurgents and their sympathizers... new offensive operations are needed that would create a fear of aiding the insurgency.
"involving citizens or the territory of more than 1 country"
Check -- it would involve U.S. Special Forces training Iraqis
"premeditated, politically motivated violence perpetrated against noncombatant targets by subnational groups or clandestine agents"
Check -- "Kurdish Peshmerga fighters and Shiite militiamen" would "target Sunni insurgents and their sympathizers" to "create a fear of aiding the insurgency"
"'terrorist group'' means any group practicing, or which has significant subgroups which practice, international terrorism"
Check -- the Pentagon is a "significant subgroup" of the Executive Branch, which is headed by the Bush administration
Even better, according to the official US National Security Strategy -- signed by George Bush on September 17, 2002 -- Iraqi insurgents are entitled to attack the United States:
The enemy is terrorismÃ¢â‚¬â€premeditated, politically motivated violence perpetrated against innocents...
The greater the threat, the greater is the risk of inactionÃ¢â‚¬â€and the more compelling the case for taking anticipatory action to defend ourselves, even if uncertainty remains as to the time and place of the enemyÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s attack.
Well, at least we know where we stand. And since we're all agreed these are the rules, I'm sure there won't be any whining on that day in 2009 when New York City is nuked.Posted at January 10, 2005 10:21 AM | TrackBack