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May 05, 2004

"We Never Forget For Whom We Are Working"

I'm planning to write something about the Lockheed Martin slogan -- either for this website or a real publication.


First of all, it's grammatically incorrect. It should be "We never forget WHOM we're working for." Or, if you're really a grammar nazi, "We never forget for whom we're working." Which I realize would suck as a slogan. I'm just saying.

Secondly... well, I'll have to write the piece to explain why this is such a unpleasant example of corporate agitprop.

Anyway, I was poking around on the Lockheed website, and I wanted to find examples of pages where they used this slogan. So I entered "forget" into their website search engine.

Among the many results it returned was a microsoft word document called "Protecting Classified Information Corporate Compliance Training Module." It's basically the answer key to a quiz for Lockheed Martin employees on, of course, protecting classified information.

However, it appears there is no normal way to access this document via the normal, public site. Its existence only becomes apparent to outsiders when a search stumbles upon it. In other words, Lockheed almost certainly didn't mean for an outsider (eg, me) to see it.

So here's a quiz of my own: when you're trying to train people to protect sensitive information, would it be ironic if you made the answers to your training quiz publicly available to every single person on earth?

a) YES.

And it's not the only inadvertently-public Lockheed document on the site. Among the others:

An explanation of their anti-sexual harassment policies, in French. ("Des avances sexuelles inopportunes, la demande de faveurs sexuelles et autres conduites physiques ou verbales de nature sexuelle sont considérées relever du harcèlement sexuel lorsque..."

Another training document, on "Security." Weirdly, much of it has nothing to do with security at work. ("Your house number should be on a contrasting background and either reflective or illuminated by a porch light... You probably don’t think of your mailbox as a security threat... you shouldn’t list your full name in the telephone directory or use it on your answering machine...")

Also, just to be safe, you shouldn't tell your full name to your children, spouse, or parents.

Posted at May 5, 2004 12:49 PM | TrackBack

It's funny how the meaning of that slogan really changes depending on who's saying it.

"Mr Goering, why are your men so motivated to kill millions of innocent people?"

"We never forget who we're working for."

"John O'Neill, why do you and your Republican shill buddies think it's appropriate to lie, distort, and smear Kerry's war record?"

"We never forget who we're working for."

"Secretary Rumsfeld, is it true that you and your staff haven't red the Taguba report even though it's been available for months? How can you justify this?"

"We never forget who we're working for."

Posted by: Ted at May 5, 2004 02:12 PM